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CELEBRATING THE ABSENCE

Author / Tammara Sutton

Whether you’re running, resting from a recent bout of the flu, practicing self-love through a broken heart, or saying goodbye to the winter blues, how often do you stop to recognize the feeling of absence? It could be the absence of overly tight muscles that could lead to injury, the stress from studying for last week’s certification exam, or a toxic friend that isn’t in your life.

Whatever it is, do you pay attention to the fact that the feeling or person is gone? And if you do, do you choose to celebrate the feeling? Yes, you heard me right–celebrate it. Not ignore and pretend it didn’t happen, sulk, or complain (doing these things are fine too), but I mean, joyously honor the absence of something or someone, because you’ve made it through?

Sure, it may seem easier said than done when you’re in the moment, but practice makes good enough! Take 3 minutes right now, pause and follow these 3 steps to learn how to celebrate the absence:

  1. Acknowledge – It’s important for you to check-in with yourself and bring awareness to the absence. Many times, we ignore and suppress our feelings when people, things, or feelings go, as a means to protect ourselves from hurt or FOMO. Take a moment to check in with yourself and acknowledge how the absence feels? Does it feel good? Draining? Numb? Angering?
  2. Celebrate – Now that you’ve acknowledged it, take 2 minutes to find 3 positive things that have come from the absence of the person, place, or thing. How has the absence allowed you to embrace other people, places, and things that bring you joy? How can you further focus and spend time with them? How can you add positivity to them, in return?
  3. Repeat – Repeat as needed and as you’re processing; remember to keep returning to the positives that exist as a result of the absence.

When you’re able to get to a place of finding the joy in who or what has left, you can re-shift your perspective to the positive and make space for all the people, places, and things that are currently adding to and building you. So, what are you celebrating the absence of?